Don’t Deny Your Pain… Embrace It
Do you find yourself denying your pain more than you embrace it?
The truth is, many times we wear our emotions on our face. You can try to hide it, cover it up, or push through it—but some feelings just show up anyway.
There are just some emotions we simply cannot hide… no matter how much we try.
Have you ever been having a not-so-good day, or maybe you’re just deep in thought about something… and someone asks you, “What’s wrong?”
And your response?
“Nothing.”
Then they follow up with, “Are you sure?”
And again, you say… “Yeah.”
But deep down, both you and that person probably know—that’s not true.
Now, are you wrong for saying nothing is wrong?
Not at all.
You have the right to choose who you open up to. But there is a difference between protecting your space and denying your pain.
And many times, we respond with “nothing” for reasons like these:
- We don’t really know the person who’s asking
- We don’t want to hear someone else’s opinion at that moment
- We have trust issues when it comes to people
- We don’t want to feel judged or condemned
- We may not even fully understand what we’re feeling ourselves
Those are all real and valid reasons.
But today, I want to encourage you—don’t deny your pain.
Pain is something we all have to experience at different times and for different reasons. And when we deny it, we don’t avoid it… we delay what it’s trying to teach us.
You cannot grow by ignoring what needs to be faced.
Now, that doesn’t mean you have to tell your business to everyone who asks you what’s wrong. But it does mean being honest—with yourself, and with God.
And sometimes, it means opening up to the right person.
If trust is something you struggle with, pray about it.
God will give you discernment about who you can talk to. But also be open—because sometimes God will use people you didn’t expect to help you, support you, or even speak into your situation.
About 6 years ago, God taught me how to embrace my pain.
And that lesson changed me.
As a life coach and as a domestic violence survivor, I’ve dedicated a good portion of my life to helping others not only understand their pain—but to connect their pain to their purpose.
Because when you embrace your pain, it doesn’t break you—it builds you.
It makes you stronger. It makes you wiser.
And it allows you to help someone else.
Today, I want you to think about this:
You went through something you thought you wouldn’t survive… but you’re still here, right?
You thought you would never love again… but you did, right?
You were in an abusive situation… and now you’re a survivor, right?
You lost something… but something else came, right?
You felt like giving up… but God kept you, right?
Whatever is painful in your life—it has purpose.
Don’t run from it. Don’t deny it.
Embrace it… and allow God to meet you in it.
If you need guidance on how to process your pain and find purpose in it, you don’t have to do it alone.
God Bless,
Nicole C. Lofton
